2015 Big 12 Football Programs As Rappers (Pt. Three)

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Baylor: Meek Mill

Art Briles started out the season under fire for his lack of actions regarding Sam Ukwuachu.

Then Baylor made their statement of going 8-0, before facing future CFB Playoff team Oklahoma, which shocked the Baylor faithful. The loss against Oklahoma created a downward spiral for the Baylor Bears that included losing to both TCU and the lackluster Texas Longhorns. Baylor’s ridiculous hiring of a PR firm to lobby for a CFB Playoff spot and large endowment represents Nicki Minaj and all of her assets constantly bailing Meek Mill out of more bullshit. Let’s hope Baylor can throw harder punches tonight against North Carolina in the Russell Athletic Bowl than Meek did against this tough punching bag:

TCU: Drake

yes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If Baylor is Meek Mill, it’s only obvious that TCU has to be Drake. Winning the head to head matchup this year, TCU fans are elated to shut up the 58-61 talk of Baylor’s most obnoxious.

He may have won the battle against Meek Mill, but much like Drake’s ridiculous Hotline Bling dancing, the star lost some of the credit he got with owning Meek in “Back to Back.” Just like TCU’s loss of QB, Boykin, late in the season, though he is still one of the best in the sport and broke plenty of records even with missing games this season due to ankle injury. TCU was the rightful heir to the CFB Playoff spot last year and could have easily clobbered Ohio State, but we will never know since the Big 12 is a cluster… okay, back to the point. TCU’s matchup with Oregon in the Alamo Bowl should be fun to watch and I have no doubt that Boykin will be destroying it in the NFL soon.

 

Oklahoma: Jay Z

oh no

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

->The Dynasty, released in 2000

->Stoops came to OU as head coach in 1999

->Won BCS National Championship and went 13-0 in 2000

HOOOOOOOOOOVA.

If Oklahoma is Jay Z, Bob Stoops is their Beyonce. The hair, the attitude, the humble smile that lets everyone around them know they know they are royalty and it is okay if you hate them because they sleep on piles of money every night. Jay Z has made himself transcend all barriers and become an icon in many industries. Oklahoma proves year after year that they have the power and the ability to recruit with the best, keep up with the best and keep finding ways to win. Cheers to Oklahoma representing for the Big 12 and kicking the shit out of Clemson on New Year’s Eve.

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